This is madness! Madness? This. Is. REALITY! (Private Lani, Rackie)

I shake my head in response to his question. "My human form is fairly new. If anything, I've only ever eaten cookies. And I mean that literally; you play with them right, you can turn browser cookies into data-baked goods." A laugh follows; why am I so lame? Why?

"Wait, wait, wait! You were eating browser cookies?!" I asked her in a surprise. My eyes widened. I mean, I know food her isn't real but at least it has a taste! No, no, no! We're not getting out of here until I get her something delicious. "So, if I got you something to eat, would you be able to eat it?" I asked her.

A shrug meets his words, "I bend reality. Literally anything is possible."

"Then, we're getting you ice cream." I told her, grinning from ear to ear. Ice Cream is the best, I'm telling you all! It's like... A gift from gods themselves to humanity!

"...you realize we don't have any 'real' Gods in this universe, right?" I ask him. Oops, I read his post, again.

"Well, our creators can be compared to gods. However, well, my thoughts are complicated and I might be too interested in the Greek Mythology" I explained to her as I started leading her towards the closest ice cream shop. I don't mind that you read my posts all the time, Merry.

Busted. "Wh- who said I was reading your posts...? ^Baka..."

I love you too, Merry ;*
We finally arrived at the ice cream shop. I put my hands into my pockets to make sure Rackie gave me money. Of course, he did. Thanks, Rackie. "So, before we approach this place... What flavor will you choose?" I asked her, smiling.

I found myself making a face, but sadly, I can only explain what that face is by showing you with a text-based emoji --- :< . How was I supposed to choose a flavor when the concept was foreign? I gave him a look with my eyes while my mouth remained, in typical anime fashion, like an upside-down v.

Riiiiight... Well, she has eaten cookies already... Also, her color is blue-ish- Turquoise? Let's see. "Uh... Let's... What about cookie flavor and gumball flavor?" I suggested, hoping to help just a little. I started approaching the counter slowly, to give her time.

Is it a good idea to make super sweets taste like other super sweets? Does that create some sort of sweet-ception? Does it multiple the sweetness to exponential levels?! I was having a crisis over the concept of "sweets" when I'd not eaten anything but "false cookies." Something is definitely wrong with me. Despite the screaming in my head, I appeared outwardly "normal" and calm, especially in this current disguise of a body. "Sure." I say calmly, accepting.

I'll be honest with you all, I read her post this time. To be honest, I find her thoughts normal. I'm sure I'd start thinking like her if I were her. I sighed and shook my head with amusement. She's cute even when she's confused. I approached the counter and ordered her two scoops of ice cream. One cookie, one blue bubble gum. For myself I took only one scoop of chocolate ice cream. I paid. An NPC gave us our ice cream. We can continue. I know, I didn't describe the process as well as I could have, but hey, we have ice cream now!

Why are there only four walls? Is this an open-concept house? Is this a house? What about support beams? Are there support beams? What are those called? What are the other three walls? What are they used for? Why am I having an existential crisis while eating ice- oooooooooohhhhhhhhhhh......

I probably shouldn't moan when I'm eating.

Reading her posts is... way too funny >.> I barely can stop myself from chuckling or giggling. I mean, sure her moan was even more amusing. Wait... A moan? I looked at her confused. What the hell? I guess she enjoys eating ice cream. Oh well, I should start too!

Redirecting my attention to the food, rather than the train wreck of thoughts choo-choo through my rattling skull and the rather inappropriate noise than managed to escape me, I proceed with trying both flavors. Sadly, the taste of the other one results in the same reaction, and I find myself burying my face behind hat and hair alike, silently trying to eat the rest of my dessert.

Okay, I can't, this is too funny... I chuckled quietly. "Ice cream is just the beginning of your delicious journey, by the way. Cakes, chocolate, fruit and other sweets await! " I told her as I winked at her with a grin.

I cast him a ice cream laced pout, peeking my face through my veil of hair. "If you want me to get fat then you have to tell me." I tease. Hell, I can alter my body type at will, but only at will.

I shook my head, amused. She's trying teasing again. "There's no point in changing what is already perfect." I told her smirking and giving her a wink again. The fun begins. Ice cream sure makes my head work better.

My eyes roll, but my brain comes up with an idea that is very bad, indeed. Tweaking reality just enough that I force no one to be looking our direction, --- bad Guest, cheating with your meta-abilities to see past my Wrecking Ball --- I reach out for his hand. I don't have to wait to see if he'll let me take it; it's not bunnying when you know that he will. This done, I pull him forward, keeping eye contact all the while as I place the stolen hand on my breast, cupping it with such. Slowly, I raise an eyebrow as my lips spread into an ice cream painted smirk.

Queen takes rook. Check.

Now, this is unexpected! At first, a huge blush appeared on my cheeks. Embarrassing! Soon I realized that it's a perfect opportunity to use her plan against her (and to feel her breast. wait what) I grinned devilishly and squeezed her breast. *Squeeze squeeze* I winked at her, smirking.

Well, we we're just full of surprises. I hadn't expected him to be any more than a stuttering mess. Instead, I get... Groped. Flushing pink, I duck my head, hiding shyly behind my hair, though I don't stop him. My hand is still around his wrist. Is my neck turning pink? The blushing isn't spreading, right? ...Right?!

I tried to retract my hand and chuckled quietly, but she is still holding me. Victory! Poor MerryLynn, I used her plans against. I smiled innocently. Her blush is getting bigger so is mine. "As I said, there's no point in changing what's already perfect" I said, hiding my amusement.

Grumbling, I release his hand, looking away from and returning to my hidey-hole behind my hair. Clearly, this didn't work as I had planned. Now, to get the blushing to stop...

I shook my head, amused and victorious. I only need to wait for her to stop blushing and we can continue our journey. I slowly finished my ice cream in the meantime. "Never let your ice cream melt and turn into a milkshake." I told her.

I pout back at him, waving my hand over it. It's a simple gesture; the ice cream is not only no longer melting, but solid again. In silence, I finish the treat before pushing my hair back, raising a brow.